Edgar Allen Poe once wrote

We have taken it into our heads that to write a poem simply for the poem’s sake [...] and to acknowledge such to have been our design, would be to confess ourselves radically wanting in the true poetic dignity and force: — but the simple fact is that would we but permit ourselves to look into our own souls we should immediately there discover that under the sun there neither exists nor can exist any work more thoroughly dignified, more supremely noble, than this very poem, this poem per se, this poem which is a poem and nothing more, this poem written solely for the poem’s sake

Be it a poem, a painting or a song; art itself is best represented when it’s presented in its most original form. Capturing the essence of the moment, the impulsiveness of one’s wellbeing, non-intentional approach in delivering what is, is the true joy and beauty of art for art’s sake.

Through out the years of being an artist, I’ve come to realize how much more rewarding to the mind and soul it is to create through exploitation of my feelings deep within, comprehending messages that has no particular meaning, and to extract subconscious thoughts I have embedded in the corners of my mind.

For many paintings and drawings I have done, the ideas are often impulsive, scribbled down sporadically in a casual manner on scraps of paper, that is, if I don’t have my sketch pad with me. Those ideas, miraculously comes into my mind through sources from all sorts of direction. Sometimes it’s hard to grasp the ideas and change it into exact forms on canvases, but most of the time, it may not sound as abstract as it may, for painting is simple, you just have to do it in order to find the truth.

The truth is, through the act of painting, from ideas to developing an image; I have become more intact with what I have felt, instead of just feelings, more emotional with what I’ve seen, instead of just seeing. I have literally brought the image alive, using my sense of judgment and way of portrayal.

Many things we see everyday, hear everyday and touch everyday, may dash through so fast that we can simply miss the beauty of ordinary things. But life has taught me more than I could ever ask for: to appreciate is to be able to put a pause on life, stand still and watch carefully, as you may see the most beautiful things out of the ordinary. People are not defined by the way they look or how they dress themselves, but the integrity of a person comes from within, and through time, sometimes even from a impulsive act of kindness, a man’s heart is exposed beyond its skin.

I’ve just gotten back from a 7 day trip to Tsing Dao (青島), and within those first few days, I’ve traveled by car for 2 hours to my Father’s home town called Lai Zhou (萊州). I was once here 7 years ago. Water has run under many bridges and my perception of life has changed as well. I had the honor to visit an old farm area, revamped into a modern complex with new houses for farmers to live in. Symmetrical walls, and parallel settings, reminded me once again how structural our life has changed into, and how cold it seems as they do not speak the language I once knew.

A lifeless front door of a 200 year old farm has caught my eye. I was drawn to the exterior of the farm. It was charmingly mysterious, welcoming but fragile. I walked in, catching the glimpse of a shadow moving slowly towards the door. I will never forget the smile on that old lady’s face; an old farmer, who welcomed me into her house without knowing who I am.

Drenched with her warm and kindness, I carefully lifted my legs and went in, stepping the rugged steps, and entered first to her kitchen. The forgotten cooking utensils, the smell of steaming corn bread, and another door leading to the backyard; I walked through, moving around carefully so that I won’t knock anything down, I see a bright light shining through, my eyes filled with hope and shimmer, smiling and pointing, absorbing and appreciating the beauty of such ordinary things, an ordinary person, but an extraordinary heart.

Even dead objects become more meaningful and more alive now. The tenderness of one’s kindness, welcoming me into her home made my trip ever so enchanting.

As I stepped through the 3rd day of my trip in Lai Zhou, I came across two doors. They are two doors both with locks on them. Besides the pleasing colors of turquoise and cobalt blue, these doors were not opened for a while, in other words, abandoned and locked for good. I took the gratitude to take pictures of these two doors, because it reminded me of being a human being. At times, we may look vibrant, hard, strong on the outside, yet we locked the door to our heart, our soul at all times. To protect from indelible hurt, pain and guilt, the profane reality, everything that is seen and unseen. But we condemned ourselves because we would still want to see, through the small tinted windows, what the outside world is all about.

I thought to myself, what brilliant idea it is to paint about these two doors? So yes, once again, impulsively I’ve collected out of pure luck and fate, the best idea I could ever beg for my next painting project: Doors. Mere doors. Old rotting doors that haven’t been opened for a long long time.

With my brush, colors, my fingertips…I will open them.

Another time, another day, soon~

Ama